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Dating people tips: When it comes to online dating, the first message can be a deal breaker. It can be difficult to craft an engaging text that’s flirty yet appropriate and leaves an impression on the recipient. Avoid copying and pasting messages – our members tell us it’s obvious and a huge turn-off. Poor spelling is equally frowned upon – read it over before you click send! So what’s the best way to get the conversation going with your first message? Find something in their profile you both share and talk about that. This not only helps you establish your shared interests but also demonstrates that you have actually read their profile and paid attention to their hobbies.



Locking eyes across a crowded room might make for a lovely song lyric, but when it comes to romantic potential, nothing rivals technology, according to Helen Fisher, PhD, a biological anthropologist, senior research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, and chief scientific adviser to Match. “It’s more possible to find someone now than at probably any other time in history, particularly if you’re older. You don’t have to stand in a bar and wait for the right one to come along,” says Fisher. “And we’ve found that people looking for a sweetheart on the internet are more likely to have full-time employment and higher education, and to be seeking a long-term partner. Online dating is the way to go—you just have to learn to work the system.”

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“If you want to be successful at online dating, you can’t wait for the right dates to come to you. Be proactive with [Liking and Noping] often, sending the initial message, and taking charge of your dating destiny. [People] who do are more satisfied with their dating-app experience and feel that they meet more appropriate and satisfying dates.” — Damona Hoffman, certified dating coach and host of “Dates & Mates”.

On the Internet, it’s easy to feel nitpicky and maintain high expectations. With apps like Tinder, you snap-judge users as if you were scrolling Amazon for the best pair of speakers. This sense of being in the driver’s seat, of choosing, can be appealing. It makes you feel powerful. Fight it. If what you want is a real connection — a relationship with a person you hope to love and who will love you — you will have to bring your most mature and empathetic self to the project. That means not saying, “Eh, she’s cute — but I prefer brunettes to blondes. Next!” You’d never behave this way in person, so don’t do it online.

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